72: The Soil In Which To Sink One's Shovel
#1 - In which I give regular-ass updates with only a minor preface
I have recently realized that I am what is commonly referred to as a risk-taker. The fact that this realization has occurred only recently might come as a surprise to folks who’ve known me for a while (but then again it might not?). I assure you that my realization regarding my tendency to take risks was concomitant with the realization that it was something I should’ve realized (or at least scrutinized) long ago. But of course for a realization to carry any real value, or to live up to the fullest sense of the definition of the idea of itself, it has to not simply be actionable, but dynamic, able to invite qualification and critique.
A risk-taker, as something like a social archetype (see: “commonly referred to”), carries with it a sense of scale: in many everyday ways, in my particular case, I do not think I am a “risk-taker.” For me, it’s only the big, particularly risky and lowkey stupid shit that I specialize in. This is specifically, I think, what people mean by being one. But even deeper than that, the idea that a “risk-taker” is an actual thing, a real category, an ontological fixity, is stupid. This is why archetypes are usually trash, because of the tendency to ascribe to something that is merely a figuration some kind of deeper unchanging meaning. I reject that idea in general. It does not have to be rooted in the stars or some metaphysical truth in order for it to “have meaning.”
It would be more accurate— and would honor more fully the aforementioned idea of “realization”— to say that in my life I have tended to take big, stupid risks. But is this a proclivity or has it been a tendency? The distinction between the two is important because of the gravity (temptation, seduction) of the supernatural: the former suggests an innate part of who I am, while the latter (in its grammatical entirety) connotes that I am part of a broader story or series of actual material events that have worked together to produce particular patterns that I myself— all my thoughts and feelings and decisions— have played an important role in. This is the soil in which to sink one’s shovel, I think.
What else have I been up to?
East Bay Shovel & Hammer has been co-hosting a monthly karaoke night with Young Productions at The Warehouse Cafe in Port Costa for a couple months now, and our third installment is this coming Thursday, February 20th, from 6-10! You should come. No for real it’s kindof incredible.
I have also been working on my novel, Wolves in the Cafeteria, and have recently re-booted or soft-launched (?) the Patreon for The Parallax Conspiracy for the Articulation of Thaumaturgical Research/ Ideas, which this year is featuring a quarterly ‘zine called The HyperText Initiative, which the reader will (be pleased to) come to find out plays an integral role in the text of my novel. For $5 a month you can get in on this action, and of course thanks so much to all my new patrons!
Relatedly I’m currently selling my old series of poetry ‘zines— 3 bucks a pop!— about some of which you can learn a bit more here, here or here. Email me if you’re interested!
Also work has been slow af but we’ve got a dozen irons in the fire, and recently we were gifted a new (to us) welder! We’re excited to get started on some projects this coming week, and are prepping our shop for a number of community initiatives as the weather improves. If you want to know more email me and I can add you to our client/ friends/ family monthly newsletter email list!
And for those of you who’ve helped me out through this current rough patch: thank you so much— I will be writing here more about that very soon. All our labor is bent toward mutuality, and I keep y’all in my heart as a guide for my hands!
And finally, I’ve been reading
Guilia Bencivenga’s latest book of poetry, “Comorbidity or The Reckoning,” keeping it on the passenger side of my bed for reference, as well as her substack, in which she’s recently begun posting a series of essays on a sort of cultural history of Nirvana, which spurred me into re-listening to their whole discography for the first time in years.
And have also recently
been convinced by a dear friend to download an audiobook app to plug into the local library here in Contra Costa county, and have read Carlo Rovelli’s Seven Brief Lessons on Physics (which I will be writing about here soon).
Relatedy,
and also a while ago I read Aaron Bady’s hilarious and cutting review of a book I didn’t know existed but that pretty much perfectly encapsulates both a general stance toward a certain cultural attitude re “(“outer”)space” that is a pet peeve of mine, namely this weird tendency for space or the universe to become this “object or receptacle for a sort of enlightened nihilism that won’t (can’t?) admit that’s what it is.”
and am currently
reading/listening to Patti Smith’s Just Kids (again, at the behest of the above-mentioned beloved friend, who sent me a copy for my birthday!), read by Patti herself, which has been wonderful for a lot of reasons, not the least of which being because it talks about her and Robert M. being super poor for a long time. I am hoping that by the time the book gets to the part where they make it big, the life of this particular audiobook listener will shadow that success (shadow is an interesting verb and figuration here. Maybe I’ll write about it next time).
Finally, finally I have
recently discovered this substack, as a part of my never-ending-albeit-intermittent search for erotic writing that, um, grabs my various attentions— and I am excited about it. It is new and it is a paid subscription (first post is free tho!), but it is good and I highly recommend it!
OK that’s all, and good luck out there. XO — Joshua
PS oh hay maybe smash that little heart button? If you made it this far? Tryna see something with these analytics. Thanks! XO x2 Oh and (PPS) relatedly, re the whole work-being-slow-af and my daydreaming with Patti Smith: this substack will always be free, but if you would like to continue supporting my writing and don’t want to either subscribe to my patreon or purchase a ‘zine, please feel free to tip directly at my Venmo @JoshuaAdamAnderson. I miiiight be rebooting my old front porch country music-a-thon live on IG this week, so if you’d prefer I do a little song and dance first that could work too! Ok that’s it for real this time and thanks! XOXO times a million
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